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On Healing and Agreement: from July 24, 2015

from July 24, 2915

in an ongoing conversation regarding the things that block the manifestation of physical healing:

I say: How to know if it ( the obstacle) is primarily spiritual, physical or a battle of the soul (mind,will,emotions?)

You say: It doesn’t matter! Whether I say, “Be healed” or “Your sins are forgiven.” It is all one and the same. It all amounts to believing and understanding fully how I can be your righteousness….if you will just let Me. Let Me be who I Am in you. Let Me do what I do – in you. Why not? It’s why I am in you to begin with! It! The whole reason.

The arguing is the process by which the soul is transformed. But it doesn’t have to take a lifetime. Imagine: If the agreement were instantly achieved, say, right now…how would lives around you, from now on, be changed as a result?

I say: Well, if You were flowing 100% through me then You would heal and counsel and deliver and set free…everyone!

You say: Correct…everyone who wills it.

I say: But You went about healing all. It says so in Your Word.

You say: All but the religious who thought they didn’t need Me. They thought they had everything they needed that pertained to life and godliness.

I say: Right. So once again our biggest adversary is pride – That’s clear.

You say: Pride and unbelief. Pride got Lucifer banished from My kingdom. Unbelief had the Israelites wandering around in the wilderness for 40 years…unnecessarily. And unbelief is fear. Listen…if, when it all simmers down to the bottom of the pot, the worst thing to fear is death, and I have conquered death, how freeing is that?!?

I say: For me, personally, I would prefer death to suffering on the way to death…a long, painful, drawn out dying with the body all messed up, etc… An instant death would be perfect!

You say: So you fear intense physical pain and anguish.

I say: I suppose I do. I think about the martyrs and I think about the pain and anguish S has experienced with the migraines for 30 years, which are so debilitating. I think of cancer patients and also those who were and are today tortured for their faith. I think of people who try, unsuccessfully, to end their lives, like my friend, P, and they become fragments of who they were and could be due to injury at the hand of self. I think the rapture sounds fabulous but unfair when so many martyrs have died terrible deaths. I think excruciating pain without morphine would be horrible, yet I know Your Spirit is able to sustain, transcend and also heal. So I have some confusion about this, I guess: The in-between injury and death…in-between life and death.

You say: Think of your father, It was in the in-between that he and I met, one on one and heart to heart. The in-between time has potential to be a mercy of space for redemption and reconciliation.

I say: Yes, but You do not cause the pain, so can You not prevent it?

You say: I can be with you in it and I can remove it. Do you not believe that you can be translated from the physical plane into the next one even as we speak? This goes back to our “realms” conversation.

I say: Yes, I do believe that. Of course I do, and I want to do it too!

You say: Then it is a matter of agreeing with Me. And that is all that needs to be done. If I need you to be translated into another realm, and your soul is in agreement with My Spirit, have no doubt – you will go!

I say: So it is all a matter of lining the soul up with Your Spirit. Back to that, as usual.

You say: Yes, but this does not have to be a big, sweaty, dirty job. You people make it that way. That’s what all the striving is about. Think: Rowing and toiling against the wind. No fish to catch. No food to give the people. Bracing against the storm – “Master, we perish!” as the wind whips them around on their little boat. Now think: “Peace. Be still.” Nets breaking. Loaves and fishes. Instantly at the other shore.

There are two ways and My way is better than yours! The word, “higher” was used, because it is infinitely beyond and other than your way, which is limited to the constraints and laws of this cosmos – temporarily.

Imagine: If you were to only think My way and never think man’s way. Just imagine what could happen! That is how you let Me live My Life through you. Think My thoughts. It’s really very easy. You don’t really even have to know many of them in advance…if you are able to recognize what is not My thought and put it out. That’s why knowing My Word is so useful, just as bankers are flashed the real money repeatedly, over and over again, in order to spot the counterfeit whenever it shows up. Knowing my Word makes it much easier for you to spot what contradicts it. So, that’s why I say to keep them in your house and mind and heart and on your lips. It’s not to give you a chore to do or to score points with Me, but to make your real work of believing in Me much easier!

It is all about Me. But what I did on the cross is all about you, you see. I AM all about you. I AM for you. I love you. I have given All for you. So all you really “need” to do is to rest on Me and let Me do in you what I do. To do that you will put out all contradictions to Me…like pulling weeds from a garden or ticks from a dog. It is deception & death removal: removing what steals life and chokes it out. Just spot it and remove it. It is no more difficult than that. And you have a Heaven’s worth of help to do it. Just be firm and don’t nurse or cater to half truths (the relative,) but stick with the absolute. My absolute is infinite and eternal. There is enough for forever and you don’t have to be stingy with it or use it “just some of the time.” Make My absolute your rule of thumb, your plumb line, your standard. Yes, it takes some re-arranging, but what is worth not doing it?

This does not require a lot of speaking. In fact, most of it is done quietly in the mind. But there are times to speak it boldly and you will know when. When doubts arise and are voiced, you may speak My truth. When fear arises, speak My love. When pain arises, speak My provision for healing. The more you do it, the more “first nature” it becomes. This echoes all you’ve been learning for years because it is the Main Point of life on Earth: to live in agreement with Me for My will to be done “on Earth as it is in Heaven.” Just don’t get caught up in going about the day – reserving these morning times for Me, and then doing life-as-usual. These morning times are launching pads, spring boards into your day, powering you up, preparing you to use our conversations momently as you go. Keeping them in a pretty blue book is sweet, but using them is the big idea.

I know this is not new stuff. But it is the important stuff, and so I will keep emphasizing it to get you and keep you on board. You ask. I answer. It’s a great system! I like it. And you are a good hearer, so I will continue to speak with you. I love it. It is what I most love – relating, having true relationship with My beloved people. You must know how it pleases Me.

I say: Well, I know it pleases me, Lord! And I am very grateful to now that it pleases You because I do want to please You with this life You’ve given me. I still get bogged down and derailed by the apparent conflict between the mundane and the creative. You tell me it needn’t be that way, yet I’m not in the clear on this, as far as evidence goes – my evidence of being able to manage both effectively, remaining focused on You.
You say: Just meditate on today’s conversation and you’ll see how it works. It’s never as big a deal as you think. You think: “Housework – yuck, groan!” You don’t have to do that. That’s your stumbling block. Why separate it out from anything we do together? You can choose not to do that.

(Regarding a childhood illness and resulting coma:)

As for your brain and possible neurological damage, it is irrelevant. Whether factually true or not, these thoughts disagree with Mine. I have always met you where you are and I shall continue to do so. It affected your past but not your future, now that you know Me better and that I Am in you for reasons.

Asking Me in (salvation) is not primarily for eternity but equally for here and now with Me. The here and now with me bears weight on the future. You will have eternity – what about now?Eternity with Me can be realized in a moment of in-between life and death. Having Me here and now is what your living is about. Think about it.

Doing God’s will in making decisions

 from Thursday, July 9, 2015

I say: What is Your will, Lord, so I can do it?

You say: It is not for you to accomplish some great thing, some work. It is for you (My people) to experience Me and all of Who I Am…Really saturate yourself with Who I Am. Experience MY Love, My wisdom, My mercy, My power, My grace, My kindness, My Life.

That is what I will for you. You hear that little rooster up there – barely trying out his new man voice…giving it a crow here and there, managing to croak out a little something? That’s how My people are…just barely eking out, managing to squeeze out a little of My Life into their lives. And it shouldn’t be that way. It doesn’t have to be that way. That’s not the plan. Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. My presence has not been allowed to fill the heart. It gets pushed out by the cares of the world.

July 16, 2015

I pray: Lord, please help us all to hear Your heart and Your discernment. I love You, Lord. You are All in All, no matter what! Help us to see and respond correctly, (pleasingly to You,) to the matters that You know are important and to not react to the ones that aren’t. Only You know. And I love You and I love and appreciate that You want us to know and that You are so accessible to us! You give Yourself completely to us. Thank You Lord, for this giving that You do. I love You and I long to be closer to you in my soul and in my physical self. I know we are one in Spirit because You have made my spirit alive with Your very Life. I would have no living Spirit within me, without You. Lord, bring a depth to the music You give us and the writing we do, and the art we do, as well as the art of living, in general. A joyous depth that shines out to others with Your sweet and powerful Life – Your Love.

I know this is Your mission for us, Your children. Lord, bar the way that is not Your way. Light the paths of thinking that agree with you. I love You. I am not often really understood, Lord, but I don’t have to be. You will make the important things understood by Your Spirit. Help me to understand! Help me to love.

The image in that story of the Confederate soldier who crossed the line to give water to the crying, wounded Union soldiers, and the cease-fire that resulted for long enough to let him carry out his loving task….the motherly care he provided out of the depths of his compassion, inspires me to be more caring, more truly loving. As Your love supercedes and becomes mine, open the ways for me to care for others. I realize that in praying this I am accepting Your challenge. I realize that in new ways I release control to You. But…I see no way around it if I am to continue to grow in You. I love You, and I want to grow in You, because I am greedy for You.

I think:  “DO you love Me? Then feed My sheep.” Yes, I do,so show me Your ways to feed Your sheep, O Gentle Shepherd of mine. Show me Your feeding…ways, I guess, for absence of of a better word. I know it happens via being sensitive to Your leading by Your Spirit. Relieve me of “learned missionary consciousness” and help me to give freely, knowing that You are the provider of all.

I know You are doing this work in us. You give freely as we give freely. As we give out, You replenish. Thank You for Your supply.

(Regarding a purchase issue:)

I do not know, but You do know. Help us to be wise with Your tree of Life wisdom – not the wisdom from the other tree.

You say: Once again, it’s very rarely as you think it is. Sometimes you see a bit of it, but you never can quite see all, and this is for a reason: Chiefly, My mercy keeps it from you, lest you be overwhelmed.
I say: Sounds protective.

You say: Well, yes and no. It’s also a practical thing as it keeps you listening for more, searching Me for more. Keeps you hungry. So it is a real help.

I say: Okay, I get that, but in something as simple as a purchase? I’m sure you can just give us a yes or a no.

You say: Sure I can.

I say: So?

You say: Listen, listen. Take more time to really listen to Me and disregard, in matters like this, your practical thinking. If you want to do practical thinking then decide on that basis. If you want what I know, then you need to listen.

When you use your practical mind, you think, “Okay, this and this and this – these are the good/positive points in this matter. And that and that and that – They are the bad/negative ones. You map it out according to the wrong tree (knowledge of good and evil.)

When you use My divine mind, which you may use at any time, I will show you…because I know, because I see the end from the beginning of all matters and “issues.”

I say: I assume that if You are leading us in this, that the money is not an obstacle?

You say: Well, it tends to be an obstacle as far as your faith is concerned, doesn’t it?

I say: Seems to be.

(Update: The Lord did tell us what to do, and we did it. The seller agreed to the amount the Lord told us to offer and the purchase was made. And it has proven to be a good decision.)


Rope Swing Blossoms! – acrylic on canvas board

This is #3 in the Dreamscape series. for now it’s called Rope Swing Blossoms. The tree sort of entered itself as a recent inspiration  from an amazing acacia tree that we have here on the property at Gingerbread hill. A couple weeks ago, it was in its glory in  full bloom! I need to improve the photography bit. Seems too easy to sacrifice colour for light or clarity…and using a flash just causes reflection and glare. As I said…definitely just learning! Anyway…here is a happy tree, with a rope that will swing you over into some mystery!

I’ve just added a new section that will stay fairly active!

Dear Friends,

Just to let you know, last night I added a new page/section…and I am certain that it is the real reason I even have this blog. It’s called, “My Conversations with God.” Note: If that title is a turn-off, then so am I, and so be it 😉 At any cost, I would hope that anyone who knows me would somehow manage to see, through words or deeds…or “through a glass darkly,” at least a fleeting glimpse – a slight flash – of the One who loves us most. So I would say that if it is a turn-off, the idea of someone presuming to have conversations with God, just give it a shot anyway. C’mon… Mind that you don’t throw the Baby out with the bathwater!

For “donkey years,” I have personally been”turned off” by the merchandising of what I call “Godstuff.” For that reason I will not put a price or cost on what is given to me freely and lovingly and is completely beyond price – priceless. I hope you find the ensuing posts of what I’ve been learning from my Father as encouraging as I have, myself!



today: My Husband…

…is just so simply pleased. I mean, really! The husband sits in his chosen chair. He has received his protein, veg, and little bit o’ fat all carefully selected, aligned and proportioned just for him, personally, on his plate for consumption. He knows full well that he is truly well cared for. It is all so simple. He watches his game  on the television. He eats his food…his body maintenance. His darling woman’s careful provision. He is so well cared for. He needs to know. And I need to show him. Check! Got that one covered!

He nods his soul’s deep and heartful approval. I respond, “Cool! So happy you are pleased.” And, truly, I am pleased, no pretense. It was  bit of work, but not, at this point in time, so very much, I’ve got it down by now. We got it.

All these things and more I have come to take on, through the years, as “life as usual.” He lovingly provides certain and numerous things. And I, too, lovingly provide certain and numerous things. And, according to the songstress, it goes “round and round and round in the circle game.”

So here I am to tell you, Sweet Ones, that this weird handout is genuinely OKAY! You have permission. We, as women, are not ripped off! On the contrary, we are blessed…if only we can see it. We do have an enemy who would prefer for us not to see it. Will we, defensively, agree with the enemy of our souls? I think not! Not me, at least! Not THIS kid. Don’t you do it either.

Listen, Girls….We must “stand fast therefore within the liberty wherewith Christ  has made us free, becoming not entangled again in the yoke
of bondage.” Been there, Baby… done that. Got a couple stupid  T-shirts, and more junk to prove it, etc… At some place and time we must/can/might choose to bust loose from our entanglements and move forward into glory. Might we….Goils? C’mon! This is big adventure time! Let go of your fears and press on into the challenges of God’s awaiting adventures!

This is my invitation to you, Sweet Ones, to embrace your opportunities to learn, and to reject the notions that they (these opportunities) “hold you back”.  It is in the thick, mushy, messy matter of our soul’s  resistance where we choose to either learn and move forward or turn away and stay the flaming, boring same.

We choose, Darlings. We choose between life an death.  PLEASE choose Life so that you may continue to move forward together into His glories,
prepared for us! Nothing is as it seems. Listen! I’m telling you the truth, and there aren’t many out there who will.There is always so much more than what we perceive. We cannot control our circumstances. But we CAN control how we respond to them! Awaken to the leading of His Spirit! Leave behind the safety of what you know. No matter WHAT, God is always GOOD! Come away with me on into the vast unknown! Give. Love. Forgive. Bless. Treasure the love that is. Nothing else really matters. I love you, and so does the Lover of your souls. Believe!





Excuse me if this sounds too bold,
but I’m much too young to be this old!

You see, inside, my smile is wide.
I’ve got no wrinkles there to hide…
No love handles for you to hold,
cuz I’m much too young to be that old!

Another year has come and gone
with lists of learning going on.
But I don’t always do as told,
cuz I’m still too young to be that old.

Some things get better as they age,
like wine and wisdom from a sage,
like precious gems and solid gold.
But I’m not too young to be that old!

And so I shall renew my youth,
just like an eagle, wing and tooth!
And every year when Spring has sprung
I’ll look and see myself as young.

You’re only as old as you think.
Renew your mind and take a drink
of God’s rejuvenating Word.
And you’ll become what you have heard.

You’ll start to feel what you believe,
and your “old” body will receive
the Life that has no end at all,
and lifts what tends to slip and fall.

Renew your mind! Be brave and bold!
Become too young to be so old!

– Clover


Dogs seem to think it’s their job to simply be with their people, wherever they go. Our dogs follow me from room to room, outside, into the garden, next door to the guest lodgings. They jump into the car with me whenever they think they can get away with it.  They go with me wherever I go. One cat, Kismet, does too. It’s a little parade of one human and three animals, trotting along behind! If they happen to be snoozing when I relocate myself, then I soon find them running to meet me wherever I went. Why do they DO this?

Is it simply the sense of fidelity that Fidos are famous for? Some dogs are so tuned in to their people that they pick up on slight head movements or a certain flash in the eyes or a smile. These are not overt gestures such as a shout or a  command. These are very subtle innuendos. But a sensitive dog will notice, and be ever aware and poised for the next one. Why? Why do they care? Is it just a built in “heed the alpha being” instinct? Heed the alpha being….meaning the one who is clearly in charge. Alpha. I know a Being who describes Himself as the Alpha and the Omega. The Beginning and End. The Endlessly Be All, End All… not of one species but of all creation everywhere! The Alpha Being: God.

You see, I often think about this when I see the dogs do this following-me-around-thing. I think,”Gee…this is how God wants me to be – in step with Him at all times. Following the lead of His Spirit always. But I “lord it over” the dogs sometimes in ways that God never “lords it over” me…as if I’m really something! Well, God really IS Something…in fact, Everything! Yet He desires for us to come to Him willingly, of our own hearts’ desire. He never “makes” us heed Him. Just as the dogs follow me of their own hearts’ desire…just to BE WITH me, we have the opportunity to follow God’s Love and walk in His grace…just to BE WITH Him. Yes, He is always with us. But we are not always consciously with Him. We must choose to be, which is a moment by moment choice that I describe as “momently.” Mind you, I do not succeed at this! Maybe 30-40% of my waking moments (and  I’m probably being very generous…, and it’s ever so much easier to do alone than with people! 😉 )  am I consciously attuned to being in step with my Lord, Jesus Christ, the Alpha Being. But I’m practicing His presence, and it does get easier to do, not because of me, but because of His incredible faithfulness and grace to meet us where we are and to return to us many times the energy that we put forth toward intimate fellowship with Him.

There are jokes/ponderings about DOG being GOD spelt backwards. And I know that some dear animal enthusiasts proclaim this is no joke, no coincidence at all. I don’t, however, think dogs are backward gods. But my dogs certainly do create pause for thought about my God. Their faithfulness to a very imperfect me,  far exceeds my own faithfulness to my absolutely perfect, unconditionally loving God. Dogs sometimes let us down in some of their other doggy ways, but even in those less appealing characteristics we can see reflections of our own rebellious ways. To me, this is what can make dog man’s best friend..if we have eyes to see. Sometimes I wish I didn’t have ears to hear the endless barking rampages in the middle of the night, as Pepper tears around the property snuffling, snorting and screaming at all possible imagined intruders into her people’s space. But then she is protecting us, isn’t she? Hmmm…

May 14…Noah

Two days ago Noah turned 20. Wow, my baby, Noah, with the extra 21st chromosome that makes him so “special!”
Hard to believe two decades have passed since he was born upstairs in the tree house room. Such an easy labour and birth!
We’ve learned so much since hisarrival into this FamiLea. All of us have. From Noah we’ve learned: to be here now, to comfort others, to not hold grudges, to only remember the good stuff, to love everyone equally, to actually LIVE in love….not that he doesn’t have his moments of struggle with self. We all do. But he actually TELLS us many times a day how much he loves us. What a great reminder he is to put our GOOD thoughts into words and actually express them! They call it Down Syndrome, but I like what a little girl friend once thought it was called: “Dancing Drome!” Noah loves to boogie.

So here’s to Noah, who now sports a white-blonde mustache and goatee, and who tells EVERYONE how cute they are! I am so blessed to be your mama, Noah. We re so grateful that you came into our family. WE are the lucky ones! And YOU are blessed by having such wonderful brothers and sisters who love you soooooo much!


PS to Recurring Dreams and the Point of Choice

Do you ever have a conversation and then think about it later, realizing that there were other things you wish you’d said? As I was meditating on what I wrote yesterday I realized that I could have filled it in a bit more…to make it more substantial.

Here are my after-thoughts:

Realizing Choice #1 (that we do HAVE a choice as to whether we’ll respond from our freaked out human self standpoint or from the position of who we are in Christ…dependent upon Him in utter childlike abandon) is much easier if we actually practice LIVING in this mode. Then when we’re in a jam, it will come by way of habit. Retraining our brains is such a crucial part of the progressive sanctification of our souls (minds, wills and emotions.) Our souls will completely run the show unless we steer them where we want them to go, in alliance with Him. And we really can DO this by the power of God’s Holy Spirit who will lead us into all Truth, as we seek Him and His wisdom through our personal time with Him and in His Word.

Regarding dark forces that try to derail us, I know that some folks don’t like to think about this. But in this case, our ignorance of them is NOT bliss…for anyone but those very same forces that would try to keep us from being the free children of Light that God created us to be. God is able to do exceedingly abundantly above and beyond what we could ever even begin to hope or imagine!(Ephesians 3:20,21) Let’s go for ALL of it with eyes wide open and senses sharp!

How do we respond to this exceedingly abundant grace of God? The more we consciously abide in His presence, the greater the power we allow Him to direct our lives and the freer and more effective our lives become!

Acknowledging Him is no big deal. (The Bible says that even the demons acknowledge Him.) But ACTING on our knowledge of Him is what makes the big difference! (James 2:26) I then got to thinking that faith without action is sort of like inviting folks to dinner: You cook this lovely dinner, they arrive and smell the wonderful kitchen aromas, but then you don’t GIVE them the food! Whassup wi dat????? Faith is in us – all prepared in the kitchen of our spirits- but we must serve it up with our hands into the evidence of what we believe in order for it to make any difference to anyone, including ourselves.

These are just my after-thoughts.



Recurring Dreams and the Point of Choice

Do you have an unsettling recurring dream? I can think of two that pop into my subconscious dream world now and then. Actually, I think that the one I had in my early years has morphed into the newer one of the past decade or so. I had it just last night, so it’s fresh in my brain. Here’s how it goes:

I am driving on a very winding road at night. There is a steep hill/cliff on one side. Sometimes I have passengers and sometimes I am alone. I begin to feel a numbing weight begin to put pressure on me and spread downward from the top of my head. It dulls my abilities to react quickly. At the same time it begins to numb my senses…as if to stupefy me. At the SAME time, I realize I am fighting with the steering wheel to correct it from steering me off the cliff. It is TRYING to get me off the road!

At this point I have two choices: The first one is to realize or NOT realize that I DO actually have a choice: Then I either cry out to God for help, at which point I get teleported or time-warped onto a straight piece of road where the sun is suddenly shining. If I do not cry to God for help…I inevitably crash. I never dream through the crash. I always wake up (or am awakened) just as it is happening. And when I awaken (as from a nightmare,) my heart is racing and I have this dreadful feeling of having failed the test…having missed a great opportunity, not to mention having hurt others if others were in the car with me.

As you were just reading this, it was probably very easy to connect the dots in finding meaning to the dream. It’s interpretation is pretty obvious. But in much more subtle ways, this learning opportunity plays itself out frequently in everyday life: When we are in danger, oppression, or threatened in any way that places us in a fragile state, we DO have a choice: We can call on the Lord who lovingly awaits our calls, ready to help in every need, or we can “handle it” on our own. We can make a determined choice to completely depend on Him or we can fight through it in our own strength (…or just toss up our hands and give up in defeat.) There are forces that do try to derail us on our journey with Christ. We’re warned about them. We’re told not to be surprised when they present themselves, but to stand fast in our faith and press onward with joy! When our own weaknesses are made painfully obvious to us, these are the miracle opportunities for us to take heart that it is in our weakness that He IS our strength. He WILL do it. We must LET Him do it… It’s our choice! God does not barge in, but He joyfully responds to our invitations!

Dear Father,

Please help us to see by the Light of Your Spirit….to have eyes SEE and ears that HEAR what You want us to understand and grow by. Please help us to always be remembering Your ever-presence in our lives. Keep our hearts and minds fresh to your love and Your wisdom at all times. You are amazing in our lives! It’s all about You.

I thank you for this, in the name and the good standing of Your Son,