Dogs seem to think it’s their job to simply be with their people, wherever they go. Our dogs follow me from room to room, outside, into the garden, next door to the guest lodgings. They jump into the car with me whenever they think they can get away with it.  They go with me wherever I go. One cat, Kismet, does too. It’s a little parade of one human and three animals, trotting along behind! If they happen to be snoozing when I relocate myself, then I soon find them running to meet me wherever I went. Why do they DO this?

Is it simply the sense of fidelity that Fidos are famous for? Some dogs are so tuned in to their people that they pick up on slight head movements or a certain flash in the eyes or a smile. These are not overt gestures such as a shout or a  command. These are very subtle innuendos. But a sensitive dog will notice, and be ever aware and poised for the next one. Why? Why do they care? Is it just a built in “heed the alpha being” instinct? Heed the alpha being….meaning the one who is clearly in charge. Alpha. I know a Being who describes Himself as the Alpha and the Omega. The Beginning and End. The Endlessly Be All, End All… not of one species but of all creation everywhere! The Alpha Being: God.

You see, I often think about this when I see the dogs do this following-me-around-thing. I think,”Gee…this is how God wants me to be – in step with Him at all times. Following the lead of His Spirit always. But I “lord it over” the dogs sometimes in ways that God never “lords it over” me…as if I’m really something! Well, God really IS Something…in fact, Everything! Yet He desires for us to come to Him willingly, of our own hearts’ desire. He never “makes” us heed Him. Just as the dogs follow me of their own hearts’ desire…just to BE WITH me, we have the opportunity to follow God’s Love and walk in His grace…just to BE WITH Him. Yes, He is always with us. But we are not always consciously with Him. We must choose to be, which is a moment by moment choice that I describe as “momently.” Mind you, I do not succeed at this! Maybe 30-40% of my waking moments (and  I’m probably being very generous…, and it’s ever so much easier to do alone than with people! 😉 )  am I consciously attuned to being in step with my Lord, Jesus Christ, the Alpha Being. But I’m practicing His presence, and it does get easier to do, not because of me, but because of His incredible faithfulness and grace to meet us where we are and to return to us many times the energy that we put forth toward intimate fellowship with Him.

There are jokes/ponderings about DOG being GOD spelt backwards. And I know that some dear animal enthusiasts proclaim this is no joke, no coincidence at all. I don’t, however, think dogs are backward gods. But my dogs certainly do create pause for thought about my God. Their faithfulness to a very imperfect me,  far exceeds my own faithfulness to my absolutely perfect, unconditionally loving God. Dogs sometimes let us down in some of their other doggy ways, but even in those less appealing characteristics we can see reflections of our own rebellious ways. To me, this is what can make dog man’s best friend..if we have eyes to see. Sometimes I wish I didn’t have ears to hear the endless barking rampages in the middle of the night, as Pepper tears around the property snuffling, snorting and screaming at all possible imagined intruders into her people’s space. But then she is protecting us, isn’t she? Hmmm…

Two days ago Noah turned 20. Wow, my baby, Noah, with the extra 21st chromosome that makes him so “special!”
Hard to believe two decades have passed since he was born upstairs in the tree house room. Such an easy labour and birth!
We’ve learned so much since hisarrival into this FamiLea. All of us have. From Noah we’ve learned: to be here now, to comfort others, to not hold grudges, to only remember the good stuff, to love everyone equally, to actually LIVE in love….not that he doesn’t have his moments of struggle with self. We all do. But he actually TELLS us many times a day how much he loves us. What a great reminder he is to put our GOOD thoughts into words and actually express them! They call it Down Syndrome, but I like what a little girl friend once thought it was called: “Dancing Drome!” Noah loves to boogie.

So here’s to Noah, who now sports a white-blonde mustache and goatee, and who tells EVERYONE how cute they are! I am so blessed to be your mama, Noah. We re so grateful that you came into our family. WE are the lucky ones! And YOU are blessed by having such wonderful brothers and sisters who love you soooooo much!

Do you ever have a conversation and then think about it later, realizing that there were other things you wish you’d said? As I was meditating on what I wrote yesterday I realized that I could have filled it in a bit more…to make it more substantial.

Here are my after-thoughts:

Realizing Choice #1 (that we do HAVE a choice as to whether we’ll respond from our freaked out human self standpoint or from the position of who we are in Christ…dependent upon Him in utter childlike abandon) is much easier if we actually practice LIVING in this mode. Then when we’re in a jam, it will come by way of habit. Retraining our brains is such a crucial part of the progressive sanctification of our souls (minds, wills and emotions.) Our souls will completely run the show unless we steer them where we want them to go, in alliance with Him. And we really can DO this by the power of God’s Holy Spirit who will lead us into all Truth, as we seek Him and His wisdom through our personal time with Him and in His Word.

Regarding dark forces that try to derail us, I know that some folks don’t like to think about this. But in this case, our ignorance of them is NOT bliss…for anyone but those very same forces that would try to keep us from being the free children of Light that God created us to be. God is able to do exceedingly abundantly above and beyond what we could ever even begin to hope or imagine!(Ephesians 3:20,21) Let’s go for ALL of it with eyes wide open and senses sharp!

How do we respond to this exceedingly abundant grace of God? The more we consciously abide in His presence, the greater the power we allow Him to direct our lives and the freer and more effective our lives become!

Acknowledging Him is no big deal. (The Bible says that even the demons acknowledge Him.) But ACTING on our knowledge of Him is what makes the big difference! (James 2:26) I then got to thinking that faith without action is sort of like inviting folks to dinner: You cook this lovely dinner, they arrive and smell the wonderful kitchen aromas, but then you don’t GIVE them the food! Whassup wi dat????? Faith is in us – all prepared in the kitchen of our spirits- but we must serve it up with our hands into the evidence of what we believe in order for it to make any difference to anyone, including ourselves.

These are just my after-thoughts.

Love,

Clover

Do you have an unsettling recurring dream? I can think of two that pop into my subconscious dream world now and then. Actually, I think that the one I had in my early years has morphed into the newer one of the past decade or so. I had it just last night, so it’s fresh in my brain. Here’s how it goes:

I am driving on a very winding road at night. There is a steep hill/cliff on one side. Sometimes I have passengers and sometimes I am alone. I begin to feel a numbing weight begin to put pressure on me and spread downward from the top of my head. It dulls my abilities to react quickly. At the same time it begins to numb my senses…as if to stupefy me. At the SAME time, I realize I am fighting with the steering wheel to correct it from steering me off the cliff. It is TRYING to get me off the road!

At this point I have two choices: The first one is to realize or NOT realize that I DO actually have a choice: Then I either cry out to God for help, at which point I get teleported or time-warped onto a straight piece of road where the sun is suddenly shining. If I do not cry to God for help…I inevitably crash. I never dream through the crash. I always wake up (or am awakened) just as it is happening. And when I awaken (as from a nightmare,) my heart is racing and I have this dreadful feeling of having failed the test…having missed a great opportunity, not to mention having hurt others if others were in the car with me.

As you were just reading this, it was probably very easy to connect the dots in finding meaning to the dream. It’s interpretation is pretty obvious. But in much more subtle ways, this learning opportunity plays itself out frequently in everyday life: When we are in danger, oppression, or threatened in any way that places us in a fragile state, we DO have a choice: We can call on the Lord who lovingly awaits our calls, ready to help in every need, or we can “handle it” on our own. We can make a determined choice to completely depend on Him or we can fight through it in our own strength (…or just toss up our hands and give up in defeat.) There are forces that do try to derail us on our journey with Christ. We’re warned about them. We’re told not to be surprised when they present themselves, but to stand fast in our faith and press onward with joy! When our own weaknesses are made painfully obvious to us, these are the miracle opportunities for us to take heart that it is in our weakness that He IS our strength. He WILL do it. We must LET Him do it… It’s our choice! God does not barge in, but He joyfully responds to our invitations!

Dear Father,

Please help us to see by the Light of Your Spirit….to have eyes SEE and ears that HEAR what You want us to understand and grow by. Please help us to always be remembering Your ever-presence in our lives. Keep our hearts and minds fresh to your love and Your wisdom at all times. You are amazing in our lives! It’s all about You.

I thank you for this, in the name and the good standing of Your Son,

Love,

Clover

Several years ago I penned and illustrated a little story in rhyme that I named, “Saving Christmas.” It’s the story of a young girl, Natalie, who had the worldly notion that Christmas was all about her. Then it tells how her heart was opened and softened by a brilliant star that shone into her bedroom window, whilst she lay across her bed, feeling so sorry for her pitiful, self-centred selfie-pooh. I called the story, “Saving Christmas” because Natalie’s change of heart gave Christmas true meaning to her, which, in turn blessed her family who had become fed up with her selfish ways. (I’ll try to put it somewhere on this blog…if I can figure out how to do it.)

But these days when I hear the words, “Saving Christmas,” echoing over and over in my spirit, they have new meaning, as more and more innovative effort is being put into trying to remove Christ from Christmas.These gymnastics would be laughable were they not such a sad commentary!But unforeseen? Not at all.

Those who are sustained by the fruit of “the tree of the knowledge of good and evil” will forever be trying to get rid of that Baby who defied, in every way, the earthly odds of His day, and grew up into the manifestation of Love that has changed and will continue to change everything for everyone who receives it. That things will be getting more and more perverse, before they get better, here on earth, is prophesied in Scripture. So we who read it really shouldn’t be surprised. But I, for one, will continue to share the true meaning of Christmas, not only during “the holidays,” but all year round.

Had that Baby not been born in a manger way back then, I know that I, personally, would be an entirely different person now. Maybe I wouldn’t even still be here…you never know. I did some crazy-stupid stuff in my “invincible” years. I was reckless, selfish, insecure, and unpredictable. But, deep down,I had a heart for God, He knew it, and that is why He met me where I was and rescued me, by revealing His Love for me through His dear Son. It happened by surprise…Remind me to tell you about it sometime.

Some of my subsequent changes were forthcoming. But I can honestly say that others are still happening and remain yet TO happen. I’m in His hands though, and it’s a position I can highly recommend. Why? Because He IS the Real Life that God created humans to live in the first place. The Real Thing. He IS “the Tree of Life,” itself. And that Life and Love simply changes everything. Everything! Is HE safe? Not at all! Can we trust Him with all we are and all we have? Absolutely!

To be loved unconditionally is what everyone on the planet desires, whether they realize it or not. Is it not totally amazing that we actually ARE loved unconditionally…by the One who created us and everything else that has life? Think of it! (Did you have a think?) Now think of this:That we are unconditionally loved by God is true, whether we choose to believe it or not. Many facts that we may not choose to believe actually ARE true, regardless of our opinions which do not change their reality one iota. This is one of those things. And it’s the most important one of all! Why? Because there really is no substitute for experiencing this unconditional love of the Father who gave is His beloved Son so that we actually COULD know this Love. There’s nothing even close to a substitute,though we try everything to fill the void…that God-shaped hole in the heart that begs to be filled with the comfort, peace, and whole love that God alone can provide. Why is it that only God can provide it? Because God actually IS that love, comfort, peace, joy, strength and wholeness. God is All in All. That’s what and who God IS!

And this is why the war against Christmas: because misery loves company, and we have an adversary who is most miserable! This enemy of our souls has been busily deceiving mankind from the get-go. Perish the thought that a man, woman or child could actually see clearly and have deep love, joy and peace everlasting! Quelle horreur! The anti-Light master of distractions is a subtle, insidious force that works behind the scenes in the battleground of the mind. This self-glorifying delusion would have Christ deleted entirely…were it possible. But it is most assuredly not possible! Jesus lived, He lives, and He shall live forever more, as Jeshua the Messiah, the human third of the Trinity. And He lives in the hearts of the centuries and centuries of people who have come to know Him as their Saviour: the Real and Eternal Life within them…(where the enemy of their souls has been deleted.)

So…while I may not be able to race around the world “saving Christmas,” I can surely proclaim the good news that Christmas has saved me. And all the trees and trimmings, stockings, surprises, candles, cookies and carols…all the feasts, fireplaces, plum pudding, and pies are pretty memory makers, but ultimately lacking in luster, substance, and dimension… without the rosy blush of the Love of the Christ Child.

May you know His Love more and more fully with every rising sun.
And may you share with your loved ones a truly joyous Christmas!

Clover and the FamiLea

Every morning I write my morning pages. At least I try to. I’ll put up a poem I wrote about these morning pages,once I’ve finished writing this.

Well, today I started a brand new book. Each book lasts anywhere from 1 to 3 months, depending on how much I write. Anyway, I’m always inspired when I start a brand new, little, blue world of clean, lined pages! So here’s my first entry in the new book:

“A new book is always a refreshment! I shall start out writing in it ever so neatly, and then it will devolve into hurriedly scribbled notes over these pages. But, Lord, they are merely a record of my relationship with You, as You influence, either more or less…(the choice is mine…) my everyday life. More and more You ARE my daily , my momently, life. And I find myself simply astounded, lately, that anyone can live without this intimate relationship with You! Yet most of the world’s people do. Please help me to share You with others in a manner and with a life that pleases You and is effective in producing, by Your power, Your desired results for all the folks You love so dearly. I’m fully aware that anything good that happens via me is solely because of You IN me. How grateful I am for You!

I think I lose my general balance when dealing with the stuff within me that I assume are Your giftings – the arts, the writing, the music, etc…If they are from you, then I should think/hope they would put me and others IN rather than OFF balance! So whassup wi dis, God?

Prying deeper I see that it’s when I strive to juggle/balance the creative stuff with the household, garden, business duties, etc… that I struggle so, and lose balance. I’ve been doing this juggle struggle for donkey years.” (Island folks call a very long time “donkey years” because donkey ears are so long! 😉 “It’s time for me to stop the carousel and hop off! I was going to call it a merry-go-round, but it’s NOT merry. It’s a struggle! And here’s the Thing, God…the rub: I have this inner guilt that doing the creative stuff is selfish. So if I’m wrong, You need to convince me better than you have in the past. I’d love to banish that skull and crossbones forever!

Now…If there IS some truth to it, as I suspect there is, then please help me to keep it in YOUR perspective, which will allow productivity in all areas without guilt. It is said that the enemy of our souls sprinkles a little dusting of truth into his deceptions so that we’ll buy them. I think that is the case with this. Surely there have been and are plenty of prima donas who DO live largely self-centred lives…all about “my art, my songs, my books, my plays,etc…” My, my my!”

(That’s why I’d like to change the headings on this blog that my darling daughter-in-love thoughtfully created when she made this for me. But I don’t know how to change em yet! Un-techy me.)

But back to the self centred thing: “What these folks mostly talk about is themselves, whom they apparently deem to be extra fascinating. So I know there really IS this danger.”

(Even in my writing this to share with others, I think to myself, “Who do I think I am to believe anyone would be even mildly interested in reading what I have to say?!? Li’l ole everyday lady, me. How egotistical!” But the thing is, I have a nagging suspicion that there’s a remote possibility that it might somehow be useful to someone. So I’m doing it.)

“For me, personally, there is also the danger of becoming reclusive, which I already am, according to some. Yet I greedily love my time with You, Lord, and in the garden, and with my famiLea and upstairs creating! And… I detest housework! Okay, thank You, You are already answering my question!” (This, My Friends, is why I write these morning pages, as they are essentially pages of prayer. And prayer is a 2-way conversation with God. As God answers me in my heart, I write it down. Then I have an ongoing record of His faithfulness! So here’s what God revealed to me:)

“The REAL truth is that when I am consciously WITH You, I actually love whatEVER I’m doing and whomEVER I’m with! It all flows by YOUR Spirit. It’s when I allow my thoughts (the passing traffic of things to be done or things that didn’t or aren’t going the way I think they should go) to over-ride the flow of your leading Spirit that the balance is lost. It’s like two different worlds or languages of thinking and being. And when the balance is lost, I am (trust me) no fun to be around! I return to being just an aging person with a lot of stuff to do that I don’t feel like doing. Lord, please deliver me from THAT version of myself! That exasperated, tired, discouraged, water-treading, futility-bound selfy self. Get her outta here, please. Continue to fill and refill me with Your joy which You have promised me is my true strength! THANK You for your faithfulness in always speaking to me and leading me with Your still, small voice. Help me to hear you more clearly, more frequently and more obediently. In Your name I pray. Amen”

See how GOOD God is? He urges us to ask and we will receive. He says that we don’t HAVE because we don’t ask, or we ask with skewed intention. He says to ASK Him so that our joy will be FULL to overflowing. For me, the value of the morning pages is exactly what happened today. If you don’t journal, I highly recommend it, but with one caution. I would suggest that it not become a venting venue, but a praying one. Write out your thoughts. Clear the air in your head and heart. But as you do so, keep yourself open for God to comfort and counsel you with His peace and wisdom and love. And record what you experience as He reveals it to your heart. Otherwise, your pages will be all about you..whom you know all about anyway!

Love,

Clover

Morning, Glories!

This is no new revelation at all but it just hit me in a different way this morning:

You know how the salvation of the spirit is immediate when we ask Christ in, but the sanctification of the soul is progressive as we renew our minds by washing them with the water of His Word and Truth. So we’re born into this fallen world system with essentially fallen selves until we receive New Life in Him, right? Right. Then we “work out our salvation” through the course of our lives, some more effectively than others, dependent upon a host of factors…no judgement made either now or in the hereafter. So… we have a grasp on spirit and on soul (mind, will, emotions,) but what of the body? Call me dense, but it occurred to me in a fresh way this morning (just now) that as our souls are thoroughly exposed to the deceits of this world system (under the governance of the sleeze,) we obviously must take the authority that LIVES within our spirits by the Holy Spirit to override the carnal, death-bound input. (Body and soul both = “Flesh” …until renewed, or when not actively in a state of being able to respond from a renewed position****.)

So what of the body? Well, Baby, as I look (remember: we walk by faith and not by sight!) at mine, best I can figure is that it’s in a sure nuff fallen state, subject to the physical laws that operate here and vulnerable to every little this and that that floats by…UNLESS/UNTIL I take authority over it with my renewed SOUL, which is being momently, (subject to my choice,) renewed by the Spirit within me. So, darling, fellow headstrong ones, here is where our strength of will can play a positive part spiritually! IF we REALLY line up our minds, wills, and emotions with the Truth of His Word and Spirit (who is the “Spirit of Truth,”) then we can APPLY that REAL and eternal Truth to these obviously fallen (in more ways than one ) bodies.

So I’m hobbling out to the garage this morning…not having jumped or stretched, not really having started the day out the way I’d like, and I get this intense snap! like an old-fashioned camera flashbulb flash that here I am walking around in a fallen body that doesn’t HAVE to be fallen. It’s like…what the hell (exactly!) is wrong with this picture? (This all goes with the herenow, not hereafter healing/resurrection idea I’ve been talking about…and that the glorified body maybe NOT being something completely saved up for the othah side of the big rivah. It goes with the walking through the wall thread too.) It all goes together with God’s Word. But the ridiculousness of the dichotomy of the Spirit of God dwelling in a fallen (essentially dying) body on an ongoing basis hit me like an uncovering of a huge deception. (“Pay no attention to that man behind the screen!”) A pulling open of the drapes. Okay, if we are reckoned dead with Christ, to be alive with Him, then are we? IF it is not I but HE who lives within me, then MY way needs to be dead and gone so HIS way has freedom to move in and through my life. My life. What is my life? Is my body included in my life? Of course! And it is, to one degree or another, being glorified even now if I choose to actively, consciously include it in the sanctification process….not just a hereafter thing.

So the main point, I guess, is that when we are hobbling along, mustering up our strength and stamina, bolstering our own willpower to forge forward, we might also be heeding the wrong truths. If so, we’re heeling to the wrong master! The Right Master not only wants us HEALED, but has made absolutely every provision for us to BE healed! It is way more than mind over matter. It is the synergy of our wills infused with His omnipotent Spirit of Truth over physical matter. But we have to take up the authority He’s given us and USE it. That’s where the walking through the wall happens. And you know, one day very soon that wall WILL be behind us and we won’t even know how we got on the other side! (It can happen many times in a day, but then we forget!)

I don’t think I carried this idea well (without spilling some) or said it the right way, but maybe there’s a nugget in there for you somehow.

Love,

me

The following was written a few months ago. So much catching up to do! I’ll get the hang of blogging one of these days…Anyway, here’s what I wrote way back in February:

“…I shall write an update soon. It’s our busy time of year here. We have nine guests and lots going on! Here’s a short story about today:

We went up to feed the hens this morning, and there, eating with them, shoulder to shoulder, was a small, pink PIGGY! Dunno how she got in there, but we called our neighbor, Kelvin, who has pigs, thinking perhaps she had escaped He came up to have a look. Upon first glance, he informed us that she was a “water carrier,” pronounced locally, “Watah Carriah.” It’s the local word for a runty pig, like dear Wilbur of “Charlotte’s Web”….like Babe of “Babe.” Awe…..how SWEET! Noah, who is 17 and has Down Syndrome asked if she could “please sleep over tonight in the guest room. It is our new guest!” I said I didn’t THINK so.

David decided we didn’t need another pet right now. (We just got two lawn mowing sheep and a small fluffy dog who needed a home, and we have with us a girlfriend for our parrot. So that would make: 2 doges, 2 cats, 2 birds, 2 sheep, 13 hens, and no partridge in the pear tree.) My heart wanted the little pig..she wouldn’t eat so much or be much trouble… but Kelvin agreed to take her and not harm her. Noah was okay with having to bid the pig farewell…after he had introduced her to his nephews (3 and 4 years old,) who happened to arrive during Kelvin’s visit.

Now I’m feeling guilty. He won’t kill her. He promised. He says she’ll grow no bigger, so no plans for bacon from her now or later. He said he had a pig like her once who stayed very small, despite much feeding, and had eventually died of natural causes. I hope his other pigs are nice to her. Now I’m knowing I should have kept her. When Kelvin had arrived and I took him up to see her, she was all curled up in the hen house, looking like she felt quite at home. We clearly disturbed her pigsome peace.

Pigless in Paradise,

Clover

05/30/12 Sorrowful Update: I was RIGHT. I saw Kelvin in a shop about a week later and asked him how the piggy was. He shook his head and said, “Clover, I’m so sorry to say that she squeezed under the fence to get in with the big pigs and they KILLED her. I buried her.” Dreadful.

– Moral of the story: Always follow the little inside voice.

I was recently asked to post a “Noah story” on an internet group I’ve been involved with for over 12 years. It’s a really fabulous group for families with “late talking” children. I usually share funny stories about Noah, because he often comes up with such witty comments and observations that are always somehow surprising in their depth and content. The following is one that more typifies life with Noah
than any other, and it’s one of the most humbling ingredients of his life that makes ours so blessed:

When David or I, individually, travel away from home, Noah sometimes likes to come into our room at night and read and fall asleep in our big bed with whichever one of us is still at home. It’s a kingsize bed and very comfy, so there’s loads of room. A few months ago, David was the one who was away, and Noah and I had actually fallen asleep watching movie after a long day.

The thing that happened was not a new thing. It’s actually very common with Noah. He’s always done it. But it hit me with such impact this time…like a message from God. Somewhere in the middle of the night I stirred and bumped into him. He opened his eyes and whispered, “I love you.”

This is what he always does. If I go into his room, as I did the other night, to turn his fan down a notch and cover him with a sheet, he said the same thing…in a whisper. He doesn’t fully awaken…just enough to open his eyes and say it. And I thought,” Wow, this is the thought that is in his head when he opens his eyes…when he first stirs from sleep! This is what comes out of his mouth before any mental editing equipment kicks into gear.” And I thought to myself,”Gee…is that the first thought in MY head when I awaken?” I can’t say that any particularly unloving thought would be in my mind upon first awakening. But are those words the first to get bumped out of my slumber into a first waking moment? Probably not! This is how Noah lives. And this is really how God is, for in His myriad ways, from sunrises to sunsets and then through the spectacular brilliance of shining stars He is always telling us the very same thing. Do we hear? Do we reciprocate? There in the predawn moments of innocent 1/2 sleep, our son, Noah, reminded me, without a moment’s forethought, of all that matters.